The Art of Pooping on the Plane

It's no secret that every human poops. Sadly, even Ryan Gosling does, but I bet it smells like flowers.

As a flight attendant, I am on the plane a lot obviously. I absolutely despise the plane bathrooms. It's tiny, dirty, and there's no privacy. On the rare occasion, sometimes when you gotta go, you gotta go. I've noticed a lot of passengers do as well. However, some need to learn the art of pooping on the plane.

So, the next time you need to poop on the plane, use these methods. Please for the sake of the flight attendants and other passengers.

1. Don't leave skid marks

You're not Paul Walker in Fast & Furious. The plane bathrooms have vacuum suction toilets that uses very little water. Therefore, it's easy to leave residues aka skid marks. The residues cause the bad odor to linger more, and it's just gross. The best trick is to put one tissue or a little bit of toilet paper inside before you poop. DO NOT put a lot for it can clog the toilet. If you know it's going to be a big one, ask for a hot cup of coffee before you use the bathroom. Toilet paper. Poop. Flush. Pour hot coffee. Flush again. YAY YOU DID IT! NO SKID MARKS.

2. Bathroom sprays

In an enclosed space, the air doesn't circulate fast enough to remove the odor quickly. Ask the flight attendants for the bathroom spray. Most planes will have them. If they don't have the spray, ask for a coffee bag. I don't exactly know the science behind it, but coffee grounds eliminate bad odors leaving the bathroom smelling endurable.

3. Be courteous

Before you leave the bathroom, double check if you left any skid marks or tidy it up a bit. Be courteous. You don't leave a mess at your own bathroom so why on the plane? It's somebody's work place and other passengers have to use it too.

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